Diagnosing a Political Nerd

An almost exhaustive list of how to diagnose a political nerd, especially during an election cycle.

You cry during political speeches

Half of your time on youtube is spent watching presidential inaugural speeches. And crying. Because, it’s beautiful. 

When all else fails, watch a JFK speech

When all else fails, watch a JFK speech

You’ve subscribed to nearly a dozen campaign email lists. And you just can’t unsubscribe from Bernie Sander’s emails, because the content makes you laugh. And you have no idea how you ended up on their email list. 

Even though you’re a poor college student, you still donated your hard-earned money to a political campaign. Not just one, but several. They needed the money! It’s about America, not my bank account

You save bumper-stickers and plaster them on your computer

Your dorm wall is decorated with campaign posters

Your Facebook feed is almost all campaign updates from candidates.

You live tweet presidential debates. And you only follow political people on twitter. Except for Lin Manuel Miranda.political hair

hamiltonSpeaking of Lin Manuel Miranda, you appreciate the musical Hamilton because it makes politics cool.

Your radio dial is set to talk radio.

Your style icons are all politically related. Who doesn’t want Megyn Kelly’s hair or Laura Bush’s style?

Free evenings are spent watching Fox and CNN panels.

You attended 5 campaign rallies for the same candidate in one month

political mapYou can easily list all the toss-up races for every election in recent memory

You sign up for contests to attend debates live and have never won.

Your drawer is stuffed with campaign t-shirts

You cry when your favorite candidate looses

You cry when your favorite candidate wins

Your backpack is covered with campaign buttons. And you have a wardrobe dedicated to political events. Red heels, blue scarves, white hats. 

You knowingly schedule nothing for the morning after an election. Election nights are completely cleared to watch the results, and you stay up past midnight just to see the final numbers come in, even after CNN has called the race.

Elephants and donkeys are no longer innocent creatures. And Red and Blue aren’t just patriotic colors.

C-SPAN is your favorite news station. Bias is evil! c-span_bus_2012

You save letters from your Congressman, and newspapers clippings from campaign rallies.

You agree 2016 is the worst election cycle ever.

 

The good news is 2016 is almost done. And then we can go back to less tumultuous political nerdiness. Like reading Democracy in America and watching Senate committee hearings. 

Because one thing is certain: Once you have the political bug, it takes more than a hard election cycle to wean you off. 

Thanks, 2016, for beating up your fandom.

                                   Thanks 2016, for beating up my fandom.

A Redheaded Texas Gal. I love the woods and thrive where there’s green grass and room to grow. I dream of living in a used book store and wearing period costumes to work everyday. In the meantime, I’m studying Journalism and Political Science, and trying to follow Jesus wherever He leads.