An Extroverted Bookworm? *GASP* Yes, We Exist // Let’s Chat Discussion Post

An Extroverted Bookworm? *GASP* Yes, We Exist // Let’s Chat Discussion Post

When I first started blogging, I didn’t realize the internet was rather dominated by introverts. I’ve always been an extrovert. I love meeting new people, chatting with strangers, and going to parties.

But I also love hiding in my bed reading. Spending time away writing. And stalking other people’s blogs.

And the more I stalked, the more I realized, alot of bookworms are introverts!?!?!? how was this news to me? IDK, I was just really surprised.

Is it harder to be an extrovert and run an online presence? Or is being online harder for introverts? Since I’m not an introvert – I’m 89% extroverted according to the personality test – I can’t answer all the questions about this topic.

So, drop your answers below! I definitely want to hear what you think!

I haven’t yet decided if being an extrovert is harder online. But as always, I have thoughts. Lots of thoughts.

Harder to separate the “real you” from online you. 

I see introverts post this statement ALL THE TIME. I’m different in real life. I’m not as funny, or outgoing, or chatty.

But I have never said that? I read my blog posts to my roommates, talk about my blog ideas with my friends, and ask my teachers if they’ve ever read my blog. (Actually only one teacher? We’re friends)

My blog and I are pretty much the same person. I don’t talk differently, or bring out another personality. I’m the same.
Is this good or bad? Maybe that’s the wrong question.

For a while, it never bothered me. However, as I’ve thought about it, I kind of wish I could be different. Because everyone, absolutely anyone, can read my blog. And just from reading my writing, know ALOT about my personality. My thinking. What I’m really like.

Unless I just delete the blog, I can’t hide it. And even if I deleted the blog, is it really gone? Looking at you, NSA.

I’m kind of jealous of introverts who hide behind this amazing different personality on their blogs. They can be themselves with the people they really know & love, and another public person with the rest of the world.

I guess, I feel like my extroversion has ruined my chance of actually privacy?

Needing to Spend Time with Actual People

Extroverts gain energy by spending time with people. Hanging out with crowds makes me so happy. I’m so excited to be around a crowd, I’m bursting with energy.

Blogging is draining. I feel restless after an hour of writing, reading, and navigating the virtual world.

I have to throw my computer down (not literally) and run around with people.

Do introverts have to do this? (I think not but that’s a wild guess)  This people time takes actual time. Blogging is already lot of time and then I also need my people quota* for the day. More time away from sleep and homework.

Also, doing homework or blogging around other people is nearly impossible. Because I’m so wound up, and want to chat with everyone, it’s extremely hard to focus on homework.

It’s a big struggle to balance social time with blogging time. And get all my other stuff done

*wow, I sound weird. Let’s go to dinner! I need you to eat with me so I can catch up on my people quota. 

Being Way Too Friendly Online

I bring my extroverted personality online in full force. I comment very long comments, send long emails, and message lots of people.

^Me, blog hopping around^

And I can be too personal? Without even realizing it??? (The answer is a very emphatic yes, btw)

When I find out a blogger lives kind of close to me, or that we have something in common, I’m ecstatic. I *might* ask too many questions. Maybe I sound stalkerish?

I’m just so excited we have something in common! And we can chat about it! maybe meet in real life?

Um, no. You should not meet random online people in real life. Or tell them your address. Or be so incredibly friendly.

Do other bloggers struggle balancing friendliness with stalker vibes? Or just my extroverted self?

Being too opinionated & too public. AKA – controversial

Ok, I have lots of opinions *shocker* Probably not, you guys know me too well. 😂

True Story: In my freshman year, I might* have yelled at a guy over a class discussion. Don’t diss women joining the military by talking about Mulan, ok? Or bash Joan of Arc as a myth! #donttouchmyhero

And the worst part… my prof intentionally had us discuss something controversial to learn how to handle touchy subjects.

Yep, everyone did learn something. The redhead is pretty vocal. Also, don’t stop her from joining the marines.**

Now, let’s talk about my vocal opinions on the web. I can be loud, writing FB posts, tweeting what I think about the world. And since last January, there’s been alot of stuff going wrong. Just saying.

But, most of the people on my FB are real life friends. People I may choose not to talk to about politics. Because I know we’ll both end up with a headache. (I’m super smart, haha)

Being online is great, but if you’re super extroverted in real life, there are lots of people who *might* know you in person. And might check up on your online presence. That’s a ton of pressure. Pressure I don’t really want to deal with. Homework is enough drama, ok? 

Since last November, I’ve been working out how to separate the two. Most of my real life friends follow me on FB, so I’ve stopped posting much on there. I also don’t read political posts. Because I don’t, really don’t, want to argue or be perpetually upset.

I will use this gif every chance I get. Because, why not?

I want to be friends with people, just not use social media as our means of friendship. Let’s get together for coffee. Go on a walk. Know each other outside FB.

Now, I’m still kind of political on Twitter. But most of the people I interact with on twitter don’t know me. They’re not going to see me in class or at Walmart. We’re all good. 😊

Also, politics and Instagram should never, ever meet. Just no. (Except for insta stories. I might post a rant or two on there once in a blue moon)

*We were sitting in our campus dining hall, and I yelled loud enough that half the breakfast people heard me. I was also practically standing on my chair. I’m short, ok? 😂

**I will never join the marines, btw. But don’t tell me I can’t, ok?

You could say I really loved this classicYou may have noticed this is my very first “discussion post” so I’m not really sure how to wrap all these crazy thoughts up!
Since I started thinking about this idea, how incredibly extroverted I am, even online, it makes me wonder.

How do introverts handle the online world? After writing this post, I’m very curious.

If you’re an introvert, I’d love to hear how you approach blogging and interacting! Do we have similar struggles, or do I sound like a crazy extrovert? Which, I pretty much am, so no worries if you’re questioning my sanity. 

lets chat

First, a completely unrelated question – Did I do this discussion post thing right? Should I do more discussion posts? Do you write discussion posts? 

Now, introverts – please share all your thoughts! How different are we? How does your personality affect your blogging style? 

  • I thought there were more introvert bloggers too, but on one of my posts, I tossed out the question and the comments were pretty even! So now I’m not sure at all.
    Hm, I would say my blog and I are the same, but other people might not think so. It’s because I don’t always get the chance to talk to people in real life about the stuff I blog about. Which is SO MUCH FUN.
    That’s so interesting that you feel like being extroverted takes away some of your privacy! I get that feeling too when people I know read my blog. It’s weird that I’m fine with people I don’t know, but with friends, I feel like they’re seeing my inner thoughts and a part of me they don’t usually see. Haha, I guess it makes me feel vulnerable.
    Ahh, that’s so interesting too! I’ve never thought about how blogging could be tiring. For me, it’s the other way around. I need an alone quota.
    Nope, it’s not just you. I also feel like I’m overly friendly when it comes to blogging. But that’s true in real life too. Oh wait, I haven’t mentioned it yet, but I’m introvert! A friendly one.
    Wow, I’ve never seen the blogging part of interacting as a struggle. It’s always been the producing part.
    This is a great discussion post! Haha, I hope this (long) comment answers some of your curious questions. 🙂

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Long comments are amazing! I’m always impressed by how much thought people can put into comments. You’re the best!
      Yes! Blogging is vulnerable. I’ve always thought people don’t want to read a ‘fake blog’ – ie, a blogger who’s not honest about their life. And honesty is vulnerability. Isn’t it strange how it can be easier to be vulnerable with online strangers than real life friends?

      I think some of the opposite things about introverts and extroverts is super funny. Like whether you need time alone or time with people to gain energy. I can’t imagine feeling energetic after spending time by myself – but my introverted dad is completely exhausted just at the thought of being around people! And he sys the way I gain energy when we go out is totally weird to him!

      It’s nice to know other people can struggle being too friendly as well! At least no-one can think we’re stalkers 😂

      • Ahh, thank you! I love your comments too.
        Oh my goodness, yes! I agree, being honest causes you to be very open to criticism. I do find it strange! It might be because I know a stranger who reads my blog probably reads other blogs too, so it’s all normal, but it’s weirder for my friends. Well, they actually might not think it’s weird. I’m just afraid they will.
        Haha yep, the difference is huge.
        Go overly friendliness!

  • Jennifer Garey

    This is such a great discussion post! Great job!
    I am an introverted blogger. I’m definitely different online than I am in person, but only if you don’t know me. My online personality is much like my personality if I’m comfortable with someone. I’m pretty outgoing if I’m comfortable. That’s what’s great about the online world. You can be your real self without feeling as much pressure to do things right.
    In my opinion, you’re definitely right on introverts not needing to be around people that often. I mean, occasionally it’s a good thing, but more times than not it’s not fun at all. I love being able to interact and meet new people online. It’s been such a great adventure.

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Ah, thanks Jennifer! Being able to be comfortable is such a relief, I’m glad that’s how blogging works for you.
      interacting online is such a fun adventure! I love learning from other people, especially international bloggers.

      • Jennifer Garey

        I love learning from all of the international bloggers. There has been so much that I didn’t know I didn’t know! It has truly opened my eyes to the world around me.

  • This is a great discussion post and such an interesting topic! I am a bit on the fence about whether I am an introvert or an extrovert, I used to think I was an ambivert plain and simple but recently me and my best friend came to the conclusion that I am just a shy extrovert (which can be very annoying). I think I find that when I blog I sound like when I’m talking to my close friends and the people who I am truly myself around which is really amazing, being able to share that part of me with a wider group of people without feeling shy about it! In terms of your question regarding how introverts and extroverts use the internet, speaking academically I just did a module in university where we touched on this and the main conclusion of research so far has been that introverts often use the internet (or social media at least) to compensate for face to face relationships and while extroverts use social media to enhance face to face relationships. 🙂

  • Tiffany Chiang

    I agree with this so much! I’m also an extrovert, so I don’t always understand and identify with my introvert blogging friends. I definitely agree that it’s cool how they can live this double life? in a way #hannahmontana. Truly the best of both worlds. I really want to keep my blog a secret from people I know in person, yet I can’t help but be so excited and want to share it with everyone!

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      That’s me! I swear I’m not going to talk about my blog, but then I’m super excited about a post and I can’t help talking about it! 😂

  • Kellyn Roth

    Great post! It was fun seeing how someone else’s mind works … especially as a writer, haha.

    I’m an introvert, but I never really got what people said about being different in real life? I don’t become someone different when I blog. Sure, I enjoy spending time alone, but I’m not super shy and I act pretty much the same on and off the internet? At least, with people I’m a bit comfortable with. I just ignore people I don’t know in real life … XD I can’t even say I’m shy. I’m just like, “Eh … Nope. Humans are dumb.” ; )

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Haha! Just ignore dumb humans. Great advice. 🙂
      My problem is I don’t know how to ignore anyone. I get way too worked up trying to stop people from being dumb. 😂 And my friends just say, Liz, walk away! It’s ok, just walk away!

      • Kellyn Roth

        Lol, sure … but then you’d be lonely … ;)b

        Haha, I get that! It’s what I want to do!

  • Love, Marrill

    I often think about this! Most readers are introverted, probably because it’s easier for use to get lost in a storyour own heads.

    I don’t find it hard to separate my real self from my online self – I’m pretty much the same, but I can edit and rewrite what I say online until I like it, WHICH I LOVE. That’s why I like blogging instead of doing BookTube. More time to think and plan what to say.

    I really like meeting and talking to people, and hanging out with friends, of course, but 90% of the time I’m in my own mind palace, and prefer to think to myself. I’m definitely an introvert. Although I would have never though you’d be an extrovert! It is hard to tell online sometimes.

  • This is such a great post! It’s true that most of bloggers that I’ve met online are an introvert so it is interesting to read from another perspective.

    I don’t think that my writing personality is different from my real self because people who met me in real life gave me a double take when I told them that I’m an introvert lol.

    As for loving books,isn’t it great that we’re so different but our love towards books kind of unite us together?

    x Rasya | nurulrasya.com

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Exactly! I love how books can pull us all together 🙂 It’s so awesome to make friends through books!

  • It’s interesting! ( May I add a great conversation post! 😊 )

    As for myself, I’m introverted. It’s written in my dna, into my bones. If I’m seeing too many people in a short span of time, chances are I will find myself running low on battery unlike you. All I need is small doses. But, I always wonder if it was because I’m introverted or my anxiety disorder? Perhaps both.

    I love talking, I love sharing my thoughts, though! That’s why internet is a good thing! Being introverted doesn’t erase the fact that I’m friendly, funny, even a bit chatty. I’m not as chatty as I might be online irl because it’s scary to be spontaneous, but I may be. Then, I don’t have someone to talk about all those think I’m crazy about irl, so maybe there is a bit of that too.

    Still, I think I’m a chameleon and sometimes switch for another skin. I definitely have my ”for friends” skin online. Even if I keep people I know away from my blog. I would feel too vulnerable. 🙈

    Usually, I’d apologise for the long comment, but you seem to love them! 😄

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Haha, I do love long comments. Even if it takes me a month of days to get to all the comments. 🤦🏼‍♀️

      I think extroverts and introverts struggle with anxiety differently. I get really loud, and for a while it bothered me if I wasn’t the center of a group’s attention? That sounds terrible, but I was so anxious about being rejected or hurt, that I couldn’t stand being quiet. I was super loud, and constantly telling funny stories, and generally annoying my friends. I realized it was my anxiety and how anxious I was whenever I went out.
      And I’m super thankful for good friends who understood and stayed with me even through my anxiety.

      And that was a long reply! But I hope it makes sense ☺️

      • We forget sometimes that even extroverts can struggle with anxiety because anxiety is so often mistaken with shyness. But, anxiety exists in many forms.

        When I have peaks of anxiety, I have the ”default’ mode where I’m quiet and in my shell and I have the ”wtf?” mode where I can’t stop laughing, and I’m super, I don’t know how to say? electric which is really weird because it’s like i’m on drugs. 🤣 So, yeah it makes sense; anxiety isn’t always “quiet”. 🙂

        • Elizabeth Hunter

          Your description is so accurate! Being anxious and extroverted does feel like being on drugs. Not that I’ve ever been on drugs, but you know what I mean 😂

          • Well, being on drugs when you have anxiety is not something I’d try despite foolish people thinking it might help. It already feels like I’m on LSD, silly!🤣

  • Charlotte

    This is a really interesting post! I’m pretty new to blogging so I haven’t encountered anyone who doesn’t seem like an introvert until now. And as for your question about whether introverts need to stop blogging and run around with people, that’s definitely not the case for me. I have to force myself to interact with people because I don’t have any close friends at college and I’m shy on top of being an introvert. It’s really interesting to see how differently you think about some of these things.

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  • 🌵Clo🌵

    You did the discussion post fine, it’s basically just a discussion so you rambling about a topic/point. At least that I do it haha. It was interesting to read for sure, as I’m an introvert but as for online presence I’d say I’m pretty similar to how I am in real life. I think online and offline I’m the same – the way I write my posts is how I’d probably talk about them in real life to my friends (not that most of them would actually care enough to listen). But I don’t exactly shout about having a blog to my friends – I’ll mention it if I’m writing something for it cause usually they don’t care enough to want to see. There’s only one friend who I actually send a link to my posts to and that’s because I’m always curious to hear his opinion.

    As for blog writing being draining – that comes with being an extrovert I think. Since I find socialising and talking to people even my friends draining. I get my energy from reading, writing and writing my blog posts. So I tend to just hide away in my room from people, talking to my friends online is fine for me. I can manage that without it wearing me out haha.

    As for comments I mean this ones pretty long – but that’s because I have a fair bit to say. If I don’t then the comment is shorter generally speaking though I do write a lot in terms of comments etc because it’s how I get my point across through writing. I’m awful at speaking it haha I just get so nervous and I know I’ll stumble over words and forget where I was going with that point haha.

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Thanks, Clo! Love reading long comments.
      I used to shout about my blog to everyone, but now I’m a little bit more quiet. I think because most of my friends are not quite as interested in book blogging, so I just mention my blog now. Instead of posting about it everywhere, haha!

  • I found this post via Read by Tiffany so I’m very late in replying. This was a super interesting post. I’m an introvert but I very longingly wish I could make internet friends. Internet boundaries are weird because you don’t know if the other person will think it’s weird, so I never try to get closer to online people. Even though I’m an introvert, I find it much easier to make friends with extroverts. I know extroverts get a rep for being overly hyper or something but I find that it’s not true! I know some really down to earth extroverts. They are just harder to find in the book blogosphere.

    I am totally saving your blog on my Favorites tab! I can’t wait to comment long comments on everything now 😉

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Ah, thanks so much Vanessa! I’m obviously terrible at replying to comments, since it’s been an age since I got back to replying to comments here.
      Internet friendships are super hard to navigate! But I love my blogging friends and all the fangirling and reading we can do! It’s kind of funny being the minority as an extrovert, but nice? because extroverts are so loud in the real world, I feel like we’re everywhere!
      But online I get to meet so many introverts and I think that’s so cool!

  • What a wonderful post. And you know, it’s especially interesting with me. I am about 50/50 introvert and extrovert, which really means, I go through phases of being extroverted and introverted every like… 6-7 years. At school, I was introverted. Then I graduated and was super active and extroverted for a long while. Now I’m in an extrovert phase again, and people drain me… But I absolutely know what you mean when you say they charge you up. I used to have that. So I guess I’m an interesting case! (In fact, I even took the personality test multiple times, and I’d get the same type, expect the E or I letter would change, as expected). So I guess I can answer these questions better?

    Reading IS a hobby that fosters introversion though, and I believe so is blogging – merely because if you want to set some time for reading and blogging, which are both solitary activities, you will not be able to use that time for being social and going out 🙂 which is why this previous year has been even more so introverted for me.

    And actually, introverts can also be super friendly online, and write super long comments. But they just can’t do that IRL much. Or won’t do that. But then again, believe it or not, there are chatty and silent introverts too. They all just SEEM silent. A lot of them are chattier than you, but on a one-on-one basis. #truestory

    But man. I WISH any bloggers lived in the vicinity. But we’re talking not even the same country (I’m international). I would totally meet them too! And I dream of one day meeting my favorite blogging loves <3

    I wonder about some answers of, well, you know, ACTUAL introverts, cause I am still a 50/50, so I can basically speak for everyone and no one at the same time xDDDDD

    LOVED this post!!

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Wow, that’s so interesting! It’s hard for me to picture fluctuating back and forth between E & I but that totally makes sense!
      Reading does promote introversion, except for when i’m done with books, I talk about them to everyone! I’m either raving or ranting about a book to my friends, so they pretty much know about everything I’m reading, haha! Having a blog and goodreads helps, and I’m trying to not always talk about books. 🙂

      I love reading international blogs because you guys have such awesome perspectives, but I can imagine it would be hard to be so far away! Kind of wish we could have blogger meet ups and rich donors to help pay for all the traveling 😂

      • Misconception: introverts also talk about books to their friends 🙂 it would peg you down as an introvert more if you went out to talk about books to strangers or random acquaintances. Talking to books with your friends is the same if you’re an introvert 🙂

        Oh yeah… I’d love to meet someone, but I doubt that will ever happen 🙂 also, we sort of don’t get print ARCs. And getting ARCs is tougher. But hey, what can you do 😀

        • Elizabeth Hunter

          Ok, that makes sense! I talk about books to everyone and randomly recommend books in the lunch line 😂

          • Hahahahah xDDD that cracked me up xD yeah, that sounds like an extrovert alright :DDD

  • I have thought about this myself plenty. My personality test revealed that I am “The Entrepreneur ESTP-T”. I am an extrovert, but I see the blogging world is dominated by introverts. They seem so much cooler than me, I am exactly what you find on my blog and social media. I have a people quota I need to meet as well so it keeps me from the online world and I think it is harder for extroverts to find a balance.
    That’s not to say that introverts don’t have things going on that keep them from being online.
    I really appreciate you posting this. I have been thinking this for a long time and I am glad to see I am not the only one who noticed.

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      Haha, yes introverts seem cooler! I think it’s because they feel so chill about life? Just curled up in a blanket ignoring the outside world. Totally jealous of their ability to ignore people. 😂
      I love the meyer briggs personality tests! I use it to help write characters & love reading through my friend’s results. I’m an ENFP & my favorite thing about my personality is that it’s the same as Willy Wonka 🤩

  • I’m totally myself online, too. I don’t think I’d be able to create some kind of ‘online persona’ that would be me online, but didn’t mesh with the me I’m offline. And I think that’s also what makes my posts – and me – seem genuine to other bloggers and people I meet online. It’s awesome that you’re the same way! I have met some fellow bloggers in real life, and their personality sure shines through in their posts, too. So when we met for the first time, it still felt like we had been friends for years. Because we really had, you know?
    I do try to stay away from politics, though. Partly because I don’t live in the US, and I love traveling to the US… And I don’t want to be stopped at the border and not be able to go on my vacation 😉
    I think I’m equal parts introverted and extraverted. I am fine with people, and love spending time with friends. But I also need some alone time where I can just chill, read books and cuddle with my dogs 😉
    Awesome post!
    Lexxie @ (un)Conventional Bookviews

    • Elizabeth Hunter

      I love how you talk about personality shining through online. I think it’s so important to be genuine with everything – blogging & real life. I love how you brought that idea up 🙂
      Oh, I totally understand about avoiding politics. I had a friend get harassed at a border for some stuff & that’s just a scary experience! (Also, totally sorry that you have to worry about that)
      Can I ask where you’ve visited in the US? I’m hopefully visiting Europe in May & I’m so excited!

      • I have been to Chicago, St. Louis, New York (or, really… Manhattan and Brooklyn) Miami, Atlanta, Dallas, Oahu.
        Where in Europe are you planning to visit?

  • What an interesting discussion! If I recall correctly, I’m near the middle of introversion and extroversion. I’m definitely an introvert, but I’m an outgoing one. I’ve always needed my alone time to recharge, but I’ve also always liked meeting new people, being around people, etc.

    I’ve never thought about how blogging might be diff for Is and Es though. I can definitely see how it would be a problem for you trying to balance all the blogging alone but also fit in social time. Introverts don’t have that problem cuz we *get* our energy from being alone, although I suppose responding to comments can be draining, but for me it’s still not nearly as draining as being around people in-person.

    I think I’m pretty much the same online or in person though. The diff between you and me is that I still keep my blog pretty private from people I know in real life.

    One thing I’ve noticed though, idk if this is cuz of my personality type or not, but I actually find it harder to start friendships online. In person, I can walk up to someone and strike up a conversation w/o much issue. But online it’s like idk what to do? Idk the rules? Idk how to tell if I’m being socially awkward of if they want to keep talking or what? I don’t have all the same social cues as I would in person! But I feel like most introverts find it easier online!